One Day

You thought one day you'd be number one
Now you're there thinking, just how dumb
To think you can raise the bar so high
Starting to believe you can fly

Then you realised deep within
There was nothing, the air too thin
You fell hard back down to Earth
And realised you have no worth

How do you pick yourself up again
Live in life as you live by the pen
Make people see you feel that hurt
Of every day being someone's dirt

You don't know how they can hear
Yet never see through to the fear
They believe in the front so much
The surface is all they ever touch

You are doomed to a life alone
Misunderstood, not another drone
You can't see or talk like they all do
So instead you melt and hope they do too

The days get longer and you get weaker
You have less fight and become meeker
You stop trying to get them to see
Instead you lay down and let things be

You never again try to understand
You believe to them you are too bland
Something that doesn't suit their taste
So you do something silly in haste

One part hopes the pain will die
The other hopes life will show why
One day you will find the reasoning
One day, one day

My heart sings

Sitting here alone
Gives me time to think
You're what I've waited for
My one true missing link

The days you are not here
Drag and feel so empty
That you don't return I fear
So much I just preempt it

Never will u see the truth
How much I really care
You'll never understand my thoughts
And see me lying bare

I don't seem to get much right
For that, I'm truely sorry
I'll keep on trying hard and fight
To have a happily ever after

You make the sunshine beam so bright
I truely feel amazed
To live without your joyous light
Would be confused and dazed

Till the day I leave this earth
My love I'll prove to you
Please never doubt my feelings
I couldn't live without us two

I love just being with you now
whatever tomorrow brings
So please keep loving me as you do
You make my heart strings sing

One and only

I never really understood what they meant

Then I met you and I met a true heaven sent

Never before has my heart truly ached

Love before I think has been faked

When I’m apart from you my one and only

I can’t help but be desperately lonely

When I try and explain my love for you

I lose all words, you haven’t a clue

Found you there

One day I awoke to find u there
U breezed in past without a care
U entered my heart no asking
And set about realigning and tasking
I did not think I'd want u there
So few before had only stared
Uve set up camp and rooted deep
A memory I will forever keep
That day will never fade or burn
For me it is my main concern
U saw in me what others have never
Something so deep something forever
Thank u for breaking through the facade
Ur love and care has broken my guard
I'm feeling things I never thought existed
Thoughts and feelings I've always resisted
There is no other made for me
I love u truely I hope u see

Eternity

When I'm with you the world seems so bright
I open my eyes and take in the light
When you look into my face I hope you see the love
And realise for me you're a true gift from above
Meeting you was so unplanned
I'm sure fate gave a helping hand
I hope for me in my life you'll be
Around for all eternity

Acceptance

There are many sides most do not know
They remain hidden not on show
They sit quietly and shiver and shake
Scared if they move, the bully awake
Not many people have seen those quiet sides
Just one or two whose minds collide
They only reveal when the person is true
They only reveal when that person is you
For so many years they have been hiding away
Leaving the alter ego to remain and play
You make it ok for them to come out
In fact, your love and attention makes them shout
For once the sides have found a true acceptance
Why it was you is the whole relevance
I have become at peace with you knowing me
There is no running away so that you can't see
In your vision they all remain
Finally playing on the same plane
I feel that maybe once and forever
I can be me fully together

Thank you for your acceptance of me for me

No longer

I haven't written in so long
My mind is heavy and cloudy
I no longer feel the same, no longer strong
In fact I find it hard to even see

I can't put my finger on why
The reason the words won't come anymore
I sit here and ponder and sigh
If I can't write then then what am I for

There's something so strong in my head
Something that pulls me forward
But it seems to have stopped and so I am dead
Tonight I have awoke and stirred

The only person who can read is you
Someone out there that seems to understand
Even when I can't and am blue
I know that you will get every single strand

My world is changing upside down
And with every day I lose myself more
The water runs so deep now I drown
I don't know anymore I am so unsure

The decisions I have made in my life
Now make no sense in the world
I add nothing to peace and add to the strife
I want to crawl into my ball tightly curled

I still wish I could run away and hide
Disappear and live alone out in the bliss
Make my own peace, get off this ride
How can I do that, be so selfish

A part of me wishes I could be who I should
A fabulous mother and role model to her
But it's something I tried so hard but I never could
It's here inside me and it's started to stir

I want to get married and be a great wife
Sit at home with the kids and be alive
Instead here I am struggling with life
Trying so hard every day just to survive

I sound so ungrateful for the life I have in my hands
But in truth I just don't feel I deserve it at all
Deep down I think that god understands
That he sees my plight and allows me to fall

Who can help me push through this pain
No one but me, but I can't seem to let go
I have so little to lose, so much to gain
Yet here I am my biggest enemy and foe

You to me

In life you have to work so hard
To try and keep things moving
You push and push and push and yet
It's still not enough

I watch you do this day and night
And admire your complete fight
I know one day soon
Your recognition will come true

Every day you're in my life
I feel truly inspired
I can't feel anything less than
Complete admiration

They say good things come
To those who wait
I believe that your wait is tough
But your reward will be epic!

Believe me when I say these things
For you give me strength
You are the power that drives
So many people's lives forward

You are truly amazing
And one day you'll see
How irreplaceable you are
To everyone you touch

I love you more than you know
And my love for you grows
Your eyes speak a thousand words
So you never have to

Thank you for being
A true inspiration to me
And I know a lot of people
Think the same as me too!!

Rain

I can't see it falling
But it can see me
Slowly then quickly
It distorts my face

It's a never ending battle
To see through it clear
To understand the meaning
And why I am so scared

It's natural for it to fall
But why do I fall with it
What does it all mean
When you have no reason

I no longer see at all
I feel and sense my way
The noises I hear from outside
Are blurred with the rain

I live in my bubble
Surrounded yet alone
I have no power over what I'm doing
Yet I'm in full control

I can't see the rain
But I can feel it
It runs through me so strong
The connection is there

It too has no power
But has full control
But it knows why it's falling
It has a reason

But what is mine?

My garden, my peace

I have no one to speak to

No one who understands

I need my garden 

I need my peace

My head won't stop spinning

Yet I'm standing still

I need my garden

I need my peace

The thoughts don't get lost now

They never stop coming

I need my garden

I need my peace

The pain is so bad at times

I can no longer see the sky

I need my garden

I need my peace

Only one thing to get it gone 

But have I got the strength

I need my garden

I need my peace

It's all gone quiet now

It's calm and clear around

Thank you my garden

I'm now at peace